Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Here We Go Again

We are now in what I refer to as "the holding pattern". We have been waiting since Friday (it's now Wednesday) for the test results from TP's ERCP (an endoscopy which checked out her biliary ducts). The doctor did rule out cancer, and he doesn't think it primary sclerosing cholangiatis (but it still could be); however, there are still 3 or 4 things he's considering as a diagnosis and he'll get back to us as soon as the lab results come back in from the tissue samples. My husband thinks she'll be fine, and I wish I could be so optimistic. Of course, I am the one who reads all the medical research and so I realize what all the possibilities could be. What we do know is that this specialist says that whatever TP has is "atypical" - which, of course, fits her to a T!
I am sure this is somehow related to her lupus - perhaps the massive doses of steroids she's been on over the past year and the resulting damage, or perhaps it's an autoimmune response where the bile is being identified as a foreign substance and so it is being attacked, or perhaps it's an infection or some sort of hepatitis. I don't know. And it's killing me - this uncertainty.
So, I keep on saying prayers - but I am not really certain of what to ask for or how to pray for something like this. When TP was diagnosed with lupus, I was blessed with strength to help her get through it all - but right now, I am feeling pretty overwhelmed.
I hate waiting for the phone call.


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