The Road Trip

Our trip to Michigan was wonderful - just what the doctor ordered. The autumn colors were at their peak, and their brilliant hues rendered us speechless. The girls had never been in Michigan in October, so they were amazed at the differences between Michigan and Ohio in the fall.

We stayed at my in-laws, who have a house on the bay. Even the water takes on a different shade of color at this time of year. I spent a few minutes of alone time down on the shore each day, and marveled at God's beauty. I always feel renewed and restored after absorbing the sights and sounds and smells at the edge of the water.

Several times, I became quite nostalgic as I thought of what is in store for me in the next few months as TP prepares to go to college. I realized that this trip could possibly be the last one that just the three of us would go on together, and it was a bittersweet recognition of time's swift passage. These girls are young women now - which is a cause for celebration, and a cause for undeniable sadness as a mom lets go, slowly but surely. Here they are - at the brink of taking on the world; and here I am - beginning the descent of my journey. But, I wouldn't trade places with them for a second. It is their turn, I've already had mine.

We visited friends and family - and experienced the full spectrum of life as we celebrated the birthday of my 2 year old great-niece, and the life of a woman who was like a second mom to me during my childhood who died in September. The happiness of one event was contrasted with the sadness of the other, and this added to my pensive reflections about life. I thought about how much this woman had suffered throughout her life, but how strong her faith had become over the years, and how it sustained her through a painful divorce. Her children were united in their grief, even though painful words had passed amongst themselves over the years. And they stood together, holding hands, as the minister said the final blessing. Their mother, who had prayed for this togetherness for a long time, was probably smiling down at them and praying that her children would now begin to repair their drifts and become close once more. I prayed that my girls will remain close after I am gone - that would be the legacy I want to leave behind.

During our trip back home, the girls and I passed the time listening to their CD's and enjoying the scenery as the miles passed quickly by. A few times, I was tempted to ask them to turn down the volume. But, because they were enjoying their music so much, I let them control the volume. My enjoyment came from listening to them sing at the top of their lungs, and savoring each and every lyric which came from their beautiful voices.

Life is a journey made up of many road trips. A road trip like the time you let your child's hand go and watch as she makes her first steps away from you towards her own independence. A road trip like the time you celebrate a new life and mourn the passage of another life. A road trip like a those "little deaths" of giving up a portion of yourself for the benefit of another person. A road trip like giving up some control. . . of letting go. . . and letting God.